Transitions

TRANSITIONS from Ryan Adams on Vimeo.

A Message to Pratt Writing Majors

Maybe you're just jealous because you're not as hopelessly romantic as me. I'm sorry if I'm not as self-important as you, and I'm sorry if my ideas are different than yours. Last I checked, that doesn't mean I'm wrong. And, just because I'm not a writing major, it doesn't mean I shouldn't be allowed to take writing classes. I love to write, and I may not have gotten into your exclusive, elitist program, but I won't let that stop me. You can't take my passion away.

Post-Op

Pull the sutures tight
so these track marks on my heart will fade.
You left a gash in my chest
that I never want to go away.
You left it good and deep,
so it will forever stay.

Haikus

So my assignment for today's short fiction class was to write 5 poems of 10 lines or less. I wrote a series of 5 haikus:

In the summertime,
I want to fly kites with you.
That would make my world.

When I was younger.
I dreamt I would change the world.
I haven’t grown up.

What time is it now?
I lost track a while ago.
I must love living.

Air today is warm-
Your touch is even warmer.
Your skin is lovely.

The leaves turned today.
From green to brown, then fell off.
Later on, it snowed.

What I Want Most

Why is it that the one thing I want the most in the world, to fall in love, I can't actually make happen? I have to wait for it, which is completely frustrating, especially since I lack patience.

Newfound Sense of Self

I feel so fucking good. This is the happiest I've been in a long time; this is the best I've felt about life in a long time. I've got nothing left to lose, and nothing to prove. Fuck Pratt, that place blows. I'll miss Brooklyn more than Pratt. But I'm moving to Manhattan I think, so whatever, I'll come visit. I'm a fucking city boy, that's for sure. I confirmed that today, looking at MCLA and Green Mountain College. I think I'm seeing Brand New tomorrow night, can't wait. And Kevin Devine the next night! Epic weekend for sure. I hung out with Nicole tonight. we saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I don't care what anyone else thinks, I loved it. Live every moment like it's your last. I'm out.

I Don't Know How To Say This

This song basically sums up how I'm feeling right now. It's by The Early November.

"God only knows what I would say to you.
You'd hear just some scattered parts of words I'd mumble to you,
Of words I'd mumble to you.
I thought that at first it would be good for me.
I've come to find out that I just lost my feelings,
I've lost all feeling.

This is the closest I have come to giving it all away,
To giving it all away for someone else.
This is the closest I have come to giving it all away,
To giving it all away for someone else.

God only knows what I would say to you.
I've waited so long, I'm feeling numb to this lonely tune.
I'm numb to you.
I thought it would help if I could sweat it off.
Like a fever, I would wake and it would be gone.
Yeah, it would be gone.

This is the closest I have come to giving it all away,
To giving it all away for someone else.
This is the closest I have come to giving it all away,
To giving it all away for someone else.

God only knows what I would say to you.
I've waited so long that I forgot what I should do."

Nice People Make the World Go 'Round

Seriously, they do. Like the people at Apple; they have been exceedingly nice to me recently. The Saturday before last, I tripped on my ethernet cable, and my macbook fell and the screen broke. I was gonna have to pay about $600 to get it fixed, because physical damage isn't under Applecare, but then my dad called them, and explained to them that I'm disabled, and thus more of a klutz than the average 19 year old college student, and they were like, "yo, we'll fix this for free." So that was cool. I went to pick it up on Friday, and on Monday, I noticed a screw in the casing was missing. So I went back there today and the dude that helped me out was awesome.
I think he saw that I was disabled or whatever (I wasn't at the counter so I had nowhere to put my computer down to make it easier to put the case on one-handedly), and he insisted on helping me put it in the case, and put the case in my backpack. I just thought that was really sweet of him.

Soul Searching

Here's a bunch of stuff I wrote in the wee hours of Thursday (4/10) morning that I couldn't post on here until now because I didn't have my computer:

[1:30 am]
I've figured out why I academically hate it here at Pratt. In every class I'm in, I either don't understand what's going on, or the other students are closed-minded, pretentious jerks who shoot down whatever I say. I am completely unstimulated and un-encouraged because of this and thus unmotivated.

I am an airplane,
high in the sky.
So blue, so bright.
I soar above you
with graceful wings.
Always in flight.

[2:23 am]
I'm a thinker not a philosopher. I don't tell you how to live, I analyze how we live. I analyze human interaction and society. I analyze how the world works, and I talk about reality.

People are pathetic

If you're gonna leave "mean" comments on here for me, at least have the nerve to give me your name.

Seriously, grow up.